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Why more women carry the 'mental load' - and how couples can share it

Why more women carry the 'mental load' - and how couples can share it

Summary

The article explains the idea of the "mental load," which means the ongoing planning and thinking needed to manage family and household tasks. Studies and surveys show that women, especially mothers, usually carry most of this mental load in households, even when partners help with physical chores.

Key Facts

  • The mental load includes remembering school trips, doctors' appointments, cleaning needs, and managing family routines.
  • Women, particularly in heterosexual couples, tend to do about 70% of this mental work.
  • Fathers often handle less frequent tasks, like car maintenance, rather than daily planning.
  • The mental load is invisible and happens constantly, affecting women's mental space beyond just household chores.
  • Many mothers find themselves added to school WhatsApp groups and handling organizational tasks by default.
  • Some fathers may not understand the mental load because they see only the physical actions, not the thinking and planning behind them.
  • Talking openly about the mental load helps partners share responsibilities better, but it takes time for mutual understanding.
  • Mothers feel that asking their partner to do tasks adds to their mental load because the planning and reminders still fall on them.
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